Supporting vs Enabling Someone Struggling With Addiction

Key Takeaways¶

• Supporting a loved one with addiction means helping them without enabling their behavior.
• Enabling behaviors may unintentionally encourage continued substance use.
• Healthy boundaries allow you to help without losing yourself in their struggles.
• Seeking treatment is the best way to help a loved one recover.
• Professional addiction treatment programs offer the support they truly need.

Introduction¶

motivational interviewing techniques in addiction

The key to truly helping a loved one is

setting boundaries, refusing to cover for their actions, and encouraging them to

seek professional treatment

. Without proper guidance, enabling can keep them stuck in the cycle of addiction, preventing them from getting the help they need.

In this article, we will explore

the difference between supporting and enabling

, how to recognize enabling behaviors, and what steps you can take to

help a loved one struggling with addiction truly

.

Understanding the Difference Between Supporting and Enabling¶

What Is Enabling Behavior?¶

Enabling happens when

a person unintentionally makes it easier for a loved one to continue their addiction

. Often, enabling comes from a place of love, but instead of helping, it

protects the person from the natural consequences of their actions

.

Some common

enabling behaviors

include:

• Giving money that could be used for drugs or alcohol.
• Making excuses for their substance use or bad behavior.
• Lying to protect them from consequences.
• Allowing them to avoid responsibility for their actions.

Although these actions may seem

helpful

, they actually

prevent the person from recognizing the need to seek treatment

.

What Does True Support Look Like?¶

Supporting someone with addiction means

helping them in ways that promote recovery

. Instead of

shielding them from consequences

, true support means

guiding them toward treatment

and holding them accountable.

Ways to

support a loved one without enabling

include:

• Encouraging them to seek professional treatment.
• Refusing to give financial assistance for non-essential needs.
• Setting clear and healthy boundaries.
• Participating in family therapy or support groups like Al-Anon.

Signs That You May Be Enabling a Loved One’s Addiction¶

Many family members and friends

don’t realize they are enabling

someone’s addiction. They believe they are being supportive, but their actions actually

allow the addiction to continue

.

1. Making Excuses for Their Behavior¶

If you constantly

make excuses

for a loved one’s

drug or alcohol use

, you may be enabling them. Saying things like

“They’re just stressed”

or

“It’s not that bad”

can prevent them from facing reality.

2. Financially Supporting Them¶

Giving money to someone struggling with addiction—even if it’s for rent, food, or gas—can indirectly support their

substance use disorder

. If they know they can rely on you financially, they may

avoid taking responsibility

for their actions.

3. Ignoring or Denying the Problem¶

It’s painful to admit that someone you love has an addiction. However,

ignoring the signs

or

pretending everything is okay

only worsens the situation.

4. Taking Over Their Responsibilities¶

If you find yourself

paying their bills, handling their work, or cleaning up their messes

, you may be enabling their addiction. They need to experience

the real consequences

of their actions to recognize the need for change.

5. Avoiding Difficult Conversations¶

Talking about addiction can be uncomfortable, but

avoiding the conversation

allows them to continue using without accountability. Expressing

concern and setting boundaries

is an important step in getting them help.

How to Support Someone Without Enabling¶

1. Set Clear Boundaries¶

Boundaries protect both you and your loved one. Let them know what you will and won’t tolerate. For example, you can say:

• “I will not give you money, but I will help you find treatment.”
• “You cannot stay in my home while using drugs or alcohol.”
• “I love you, but I won’t lie or cover for you anymore.”

Boundaries are

not about punishment

—they are about

protecting yourself while encouraging change

.

2. Encourage Professional Treatment¶

One of the best ways to support someone struggling with addiction is to

guide them toward treatment

. Many people don’t seek help on their own, so offering resources can make a difference.

Let them know that

addiction is a disease

, and professional treatment can help them

regain control

of their life. Offer to help them find a

treatment center, attend an appointment, or talk to a counselor

.

3. Stop Enabling Their Behavior¶

Once you recognize

enabling behaviors

, it’s important to

stop them

. This might mean

refusing to give financial help, not covering for their actions, and letting them face natural consequences

.

Although it may feel harsh, it is one of the best ways to help them realize

they need treatment

.

4. Seek Support for Yourself¶

Loving someone with addiction is emotionally exhausting. Seeking help for yourself can make a difference. Family therapy, counseling, or

support groups like Al-Anon

can help you

cope with the challenges

of addiction in your family.

The Importance of Addiction Treatment¶

Many people struggling with addiction

will not seek help on their own

. Without treatment, addiction often

worsens over time

, affecting health, relationships, and finances.

What Does Addiction Treatment Involve?¶

A comprehensive

addiction treatment program

includes:

• Medical detox to remove substances from the body safely.
• Therapy and counseling to address the root causes of addiction.
• Inpatient or outpatient programs, depending on the severity of the addiction.
• Family therapy to help loved ones rebuild trust and communication.

Getting treatment is the

first step toward recovery

, and having support from family members can

increase the chances of success

.

How Can Understanding MOUD Help in Supporting Someone Struggling With Addiction Without Enabling Them?¶

Understanding MOUD is essential for effectively supporting someone struggling with addiction. By exploring the benefits of medication for addiction, caregivers can provide informed guidance without enabling unhealthy behaviors. This knowledge empowers loved ones to foster recovery while maintaining boundaries, ultimately promoting a healthier environment for sustainable change.

Conclusion: Help Your Loved One Get the Treatment They Need¶

Supporting a loved one struggling with

addiction

is not easy, but it is possible. The key is to

support them without enabling them

, set

healthy boundaries

, and encourage them to

seek professional treatment

.

Professional treatment is available if your loved one is

ready to get help

.

Virtue Recovery Houston

offers

comprehensive addiction treatment programs

that can help them start their

journey to recovery

.

Call

866-457-4811

today to speak with a caring professional and take the first step toward healing.

FAQs About The Difference Between Helping and Enabling Addiction¶

How can I help my loved one without enabling them?¶

You can

support them by setting boundaries

, refusing to cover for their actions, and encouraging them to

seek professional treatment

. Avoid giving money or making excuses for their behavior.

What are the signs that I am enabling someone’s addiction?¶

If you

make excuses for them, give them financial help, take over their responsibilities, or ignore their substance use

, you may be enabling them. Recognizing these behaviors is the first step toward change.

Why is setting boundaries important when helping someone with addiction?¶

Boundaries protect both you and your loved one. They prevent

codependency and enablement

while encouraging them to

take responsibility for their actions

.

When should I encourage someone to seek treatment?¶

If their substance use is

affecting their health, job, relationships, or safety

, it’s time to encourage treatment. The sooner they get help, the better their chances of recovery.

Where can my loved one get help for addiction?¶

Virtue Recovery Houston offers

comprehensive addiction treatment programs

. Call

866-457-4811

today for confidential support and guidance.

Resources¶

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC6419765/

https://www.ptsd.va.gov/apps/craftsud/lesson05/05_021.htm

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/addict-in-the-family/202410/are-you-helping-or-enabling-your-addicted-loved-one